…for a living. We are meant to LIVE for a living!

We are not meant to drive business metrics. To deliver on a mission or vision. We are not meant to clock in at 8am and leave at god knows what time or to allow the faults, frustrations and worries of the day dwell in our minds when picking up our kids or spending time with those that are important to us.

Your jobs may be important to the day to day but your job is NOT the reason you are here.

What we were meant to do…

We were put on this earth to affect other peoples lives. Our sole purpose is to build, cultivate, commune and love each other!

YOU are the reason you are here! WE are the reason we are here!

Don’t forget that. Life may get you down but don’t allow that small time of frustration and meaningless moment of nothing get in the way of doing for others.

We were meant to love each other!

The following is a short film from Matt Morris’s  Mr. Happy Man which tells the story of 88-year-old Johnny Barnes, a Hamilton, Bermuda native who spends six hours every day, “come rain or shine,” standing at a local intersection telling drivers he loves them. And oh how they do love him back!

Click on this Mr. Happy Man link to see the video from Matt Morris Films on Vimeo.

More and more I am being reminded that life and learning can all go back to childhood.  That who we were, are, and could become, stems from the simplest ideas. I am now a firm believer that nothing can reinforce life’s lesson’s more than being a parent. Nothing can test your levels of leadership in work, with colleagues, friends and people more that the tests with your child.

Proverbs 22:6  Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

This mindset is reinforced everyday in the conversations and scenerios I witness in work and especially in the interactions with my 3 year old son. Every night he has a routine that he plays out with me. Part of this routine is a story before he lays down for bed. It can be short or long but a story Can Has to happen before he goes to bed. One of the books he always chooses is from Dr Seuss called “The Bippolo Seed and Other Lost Stories.”

One of his favorite stories is The Sneetches which tells the story of odd-looking yellow creatures with stomachs that tend to stick out. For some reason, half of the Sneetches boast stars on their bellies, which they believe makes them superior to those who lack stars. “With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they’d snort. ‘We’ll have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort!’ Overall Seuss shows just how ridiculous the “we’re better than them” mentality can be while illustrating the Classic Divide between us and them.

Often this is why we have issues with projects, conflict in relationships and failures in communication: the mentality that somehow I am better than you or I am right and you are inherently wrong.

“Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.” Dr Seuss

Leadership, while hard to believe, is actually simple. It is just how we react and act to the situations and people we face? So with that I leave you with some Dr Seuss quotes and stories! Enjoy!!!

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”

“I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I’ve bought a big bat. I’m all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”

“Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.”

“I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, And that enables you to laugh at life’s realities.”

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own.
And you know what you know. You are the guy who’ll decide where to go.”

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not.”

“I’m afraid sometimes
you’ll play lonely games too,
games you can’t win
because you’ll play against you”

“So be sure when you step, Step with care and great tact. And remember that life’s A Great Balancing Act. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed).”

“Why fit in when you were born to stand out?”

“Changing their stars every minute or two. They kept paying money.
They kept running through until the Plain nor the Star-Bellies knew
Whether this one was that one or that one was this one. Or which one
Was what one or what one was who.

“Then, when every last cent of their money was spent,
The Fix-It-Up Chappie packed up. And he went.
And he laughed as he drove In his car up the beach,
“They never will learn. No. You can’t Teach a Sneetch!”

But McBean was quite wrong. I’m quite happy to say.
That the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day.
The day they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches.
And no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches.
That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars and whether
They had one, or not, upon thars.”   ~ The Sneetches – Dr Suess

…you really should not be here. I mean, I think it is great that you visit this online site fillied with fact, opinion and rant but it’s Christmas time. Get off the darn internet, your phone, tablet, kindle… and get with the people you rarely talk to or see. Get busy spending quality time with the people who matter!

Merry Christmas…

… Happy Birthday Jesus and God Bless (yeah I said it)!

Note: I wrote this on Tuesday!

In 1999 I was working for a financial services company. I had a boss that, at the beginning of my tenure I believed was great. Many of my co-workers had warned me not to get too comfortable and be careful. “When you least expect it, she will show her true colors.”

I just went a long with work. Fast forward to 2000. I was starting to hate my job. I am a pretty positive person and don’t try to let too many things get me down. And while I did not want to fall into the trap of what my co-workers had been saying, the negative atmosphere my boss was creating was not making it any easier. Basically I was in a tough place.

But this is about something else

This is not about my boss. This is more about a policy. So fast forward to December 2000. I had used up much of my vacation by the end of the year but I still had 2 days left in my vacation bank. I had planned on taking more of a long weekend rather then a full week vacation anyway so I wasn’t down about not having more vacation. I would straddle a holiday, taking that Friday off and leaving a little early on a Thursday. No big deal.

It’s a little more serious then it seems

The vacation wasn’t a big deal but me getting home was. See most of my vacation I typically save for the end of the year. But the week before my mom was admitted into the hospital as a result of heart complications resulting from years of problems with arthritus, diabetes and heart problems. So the week before I took a few days to go back home and spent some time with her. I could not stay… mainly because I had to be back to work. But I vowed I would be back the next to spend more time with her until she got better. The weekend I was going back was between Christmas and New Years.

December 28, 2000 – The phone rings

“Ben, are you sitting down.” It was my sister calling me on my office phone. Her voice was trembling. I could tell she had been crying. I wondered what was wrong. Why she was so frantic.

“Mom’s dead.”

My heart stopped. I almost dropped the phone. I can’t remember what was said. What other words were exchanged. All I know is that I went straight to the bathroom after the call was finished. I went into the biggest stall and I cried. I sat in the corner of that stall sobbing. Each time someone came in I would try to quiet myself. As soon as they left it would start again. I may have been in there for an hour. I don’t remember… but what I do remember is something related to a policy.

I went back to my desk and acted like nothing was wrong. Still planning to head out that day to go back home. My mother’s funeral would be sometime that following week. I went to my supervisors office and explained the situation. I was told something to the fact of “you only have a few days… you will have to use those… since you have no other vacation days…” I was basically told tough luck. You only have so many days and as long as you don’t use more that that you will be OK.

I wasn’t OK. It wasn’t OK. I was too sad to be pissed. I was too numb to really be mad. Too young to know any better.

Back then who cared about policy

At that time I barely ever read policy. Didn’t really know how to use or take advantage of my health benefits. Never took part in my 401K and company contribution plan. I just sort of worked. It wasn’t until about a year later that I saw the company details on our Bereavement Policy. I never knew what the term Bereavement was and I was in HR. I focused on other stuff in that job. If I would have known I would have had a few extra days to spend with family and greave.

Was my boss was a jerk? Yes! Was the fact that she did not inform me about the bereavement policy completely her fault? No!

Some of it was my fault. My fault  for not understanding nor being aware of what the company offered. With this weekend starting off the other holiday weekends to come, think a bit. Understand what your benefits are and the policies around them.

Has there been a policy in your company that you weren’t initially aware of but could have benefited from?